Tantrums. Screaming. Hitting. Kicking.
If you’re parenting a toddler, chances are you’ve seen these outbursts more than once — and maybe even asked yourself, “Is this normal?” or “How do I help my child calm down?”
The answer is: Yes, it’s normal — and yes, you can help.
In this blog post, we’ll explore simple, effective ways to manage toddler anger with love, patience, and understanding
Why Do Toddlers Get Angry?
Toddlers (ages 1–3) are still learning how to express emotions. Anger shows up when:
- They feel frustrated because they can’t do or say what they want.
- They’re hungry, tired, or overstimulated.
- They’re testing limits or reacting to “no”.
- They feel ignored or misunderstood.
Anger isn’t “bad” — it’s just a big feeling in a small body. What they need most is your calm presence and guidance.
What NOT to Do During a Toddler Meltdown
Let’s start with what to avoid:
- ❌ Don’t yell back — it adds more fire.
- ❌ Don’t shame or punish them for being upset.
- ❌ Don’t ignore the emotion — help them understand it.
Remember, your response teaches your toddler how to manage emotions in the future.
What TO Do: 6 Anger Management Tips for Toddlers
1. Stay Calm and Grounded
When your toddler is having a meltdown, your calmness is their anchor. Breathe deeply, speak softly, and remind yourself: “They’re not giving me a hard time; they’re having a hard time.”
2. Name the Emotion
Help your child learn the words for what they feel. Say things like:
- “You’re feeling angry because the toy broke.”
- “It’s okay to feel mad. I’m here.”
This builds emotional intelligence from a young age.
3. Create a Safe “Calm Down” Space
Have a cozy spot in your home with a pillow, favorite toy, or books. Let your toddler go there when they need a break.
Not as punishment — but as a peaceful place to feel better.
4. Teach Simple Coping Tools
Toddlers can learn calming techniques like:
- Taking 3 deep breaths (blow like blowing bubbles)
- Squeezing a soft toy
- Using a calm-down jar or picture book
Practice these when they’re not upset so they remember them during outbursts.
5. Stick to Routines
Consistency helps toddlers feel safe and secure. Stick to regular sleep, meal, and play schedules to reduce overwhelm and frustration.
6. Praise Positive Behavior
When your toddler calms down or uses words instead of yelling, praise them:
- “You used your words — I’m so proud of you!”
- “You were upset but you didn’t hit. That’s amazing.”
This encourages more of the behavior you want to see.
Final Thoughts: Guiding, Not Controlling
Anger is part of growing up — and your child needs help learning how to manage it. By staying calm, teaching emotional language, and offering gentle support, you’re giving them lifelong tools to handle big emotions.
You’re not just managing anger — you’re building connection, trust, and emotional strength.
You’ve got this. 💛
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